. . . : : The Frequency Foundation / K–12 Mental Health Mentor & Mystic
. : .
“Dr. Gergana Dimitrova, my personal psychiatrist, friend, and former Chief Medical Director at The Carolina Center for Behavioral Health in Greer, South Carolina, made a final query during our last session one evening four years ago. She leaned in and said quite nonchalantly, ‘David, have you ever considered you don’t have any mental illness at all? Could you possibly just have an immensely rich imagination?’ Since then I’ve even been briefly labeled macro-religious and schizoaffective. Both were debunked by professionals on my complete body, mind, and spirit health care team. It turns out I’m a rare INFJ empath after fifty years believed to be a wicked narcissist.
That deeply rooted empath distinction was a welcome surprise along with also being a rare Zodiac triad and born four weeks early. I also share a birthday with Edgar Allan Poe and Leonardo da Vinci’s name and my own name assigned at birth, later changed to its current incarnation, share every letter but one. In da Vinci fashion if I add my universal number three mirrored it becomes the missing letter E. Like all of us, I have a weath of stories I’d love to share around the campfire. Wisdom only arrived through making mistakes, but unless we notice them and make course corrections we easily fall into endless loops of our design. Breaking that monotonous existence becomes even more difficult the longer we remain trapped.
Regarding Dr. D’s final query about me having bipolar 1 versus an overly active imagination, it appears, by divine design, it’s both. My mental malady, equipped alongside an activated, intuitive imagination, once combined became my creative, flow state superpower. It’s been over four years now as I’m writing this that I had any sort of creative block. However, I have to remain vigilant and more than anything else intentionally consistent with my physical, mental, and spiritual health. This consistency is the key to keeping myself inline with my purpose. Just as Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben warned in Sam Raimi’s first Spider-Man film, as if by prophecy, ‘great power comes with great responsibility. Remember that Pete, remember that.’
After a lifetime of observations and diagnoses, both by doctors, therapist, and of my own volition, I had to be the one to swallow the pill and take my mental health seriously. Born with the artist’s temperment, manic depressive disorder, nowadays coined as bipolar one, I was born with superpowers. However it took me fifty years to graduate from boot camp and take on the role of a mental health Five-Star General. Yet, just as Maverick, here I am, Captain, with a list of more than thirty citations and distinctions. Even garnering two Humanitarian Awards while living and learning at Skyland Trail in Atlanta, Georgia from June 2010 – February 2011. CBT wasn’t for me, but DBT was like a comfy, warm blanket right out of the dryer.”
“I risked everything in order to discover the truth. What I found was extraordinary.” — V for Victor
“Now pause from scrolling for a moment to consider your mental health that we sometimes filter from an external view of ourselves. Time to redefine and rewrite our algorithm. So let’s go!
Hello and welcome to the Daily Dose from The Frequency Foundation:
A simple mind shift provides the key naturally erasing crippling anxiety. By placing it on temporary hold via a therapist or meds won’t suffice. Their offerings provide just a brief respite. There’s very little we actually retain through advice from external experts. We are the source of the mental maladies that stew like quicksand contracting and expanding imprisoning our happiness that’s kept hostage while we remain trapped within endless halls of mirrors where we replay and newly form even more torturous anxieties. Believe me, I’ve been there myself on the daily for decades. Now I’m free.
Now extinguish the fires by simply doing one thing: the opposite of what your mind’s Groundhog Day variety procrastination hamster wheel does to trick us by spinning endless, distracting yarns. Quiet your frantic, manic minds and enjoy a pure, immediate release by applying a core component of DBT. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, that is to say, simply apply Opposite Action. Nike ‘Just Do’ and Leonardo, too, knew this well. Just do and the pain melts away. Rinse and repeat this method equipping yourself with your own golden elixir. I add some earthy turmeric and ceylon cinnamon with a dash of vanilla to mine.
Add this crucial mental armor to your life today, and you’ll learn how to replace procrastination with self love and a renewed sense of pride and purpose. I know it sounds too good to be true. I thought so, too, but it consistently surprises me every day the more I lean into it. Plus, it’s an exponential force forever expanding. The more we wield it, the more we gain in inner knowing and wisdom. Know and master thyself and accomplish anything you put your mind to through earnest exploration.
Consider it your daily doses of protection from your own mind’s distortions bent by the world around us influencing our world within. Protect and nourish your divine spark. You’re worth it. Believe and be well.”
“When tended to patiently, passionately, even a simple seedling sprouts a root system — nearly completely unseen — tasked with the dividing of boulders, joints and marrow, now crushed into mere piles of rubble and dust. I write Stories That Come Alive. Do not be afraid.”
— D A V I D V I N S O N / A R T I S T . . : T H I N K E R : . . D R E A M E R . . : P O L Y M A T H : : : I N F J . : : : M O D E S T P S Y C H I C O F M A G E N T A S E A . : .
I’ve always been able to fly. Born exactly four weeks early, I could still see my wings as an echo before they disappeared overnight on the cusp of Aquarius and Pisces. I don’t know if it’s astral projection or a byproduct of lucid dreaming where I’m in control. As far back as I can remember, I dreamt of swimming breaststroke down the hallways of my childhood home. It started three years before I first saw Superman: The Movie in 1978. Each time I took flight I felt the air resistance pushing back against me. A similar sensation of swimming underwater at our neighborhood pool during the sweltering summers of the seventies.
As an adult, my flight plan shifted to skimming along the edges of skyscrapers on my rollerblades, able to adjust my center of gravity into a localized state in order for me never to falter. I was now flying while asleep and awake. Invincible. Then it happened. I finally fell. Then I fell again. This process repeated itself for five decades, half a lifetime. I was beaten down until one night I realized that my flame was still burning. A faint flicker hidden within the recesses of my mind’s eye. Brighter than the edges of the moon during a full eclipse.
When I close my eyes I see mysterious, glowing phosphenes of pure starlight even in the inky blackness at the intersection of deep midnight and dawn. When I stopped pretending that I knew everything, accepting that I know nothing, my life began to change. My mind shifted. Dreams weren’t mere fantasies anymore. They were real. Their inner knowings found scribbled all over my DNA written in a forgotten language that’s now crystal clear. Some consider I’ve gone over the deep end. No. I just decided to get out of the pool.
After drying off I decided to pass on the road less traveled. Instead I took to the skies where there are no limits. Anything is possible. Rules? There are no rules for one that believes. I’ve been surrounded by masters of the fine crafts of planting, nurturing, cultivating, and harvesting truly activated intuition, pure imagination, intellect, and predictive spontaneity. They’re the icons, masters, and mentors who guided me by reminding me I knew how to fly all along. My wings were just invisible. Now I can spread them while wide awake. I’m lying beyond the stratosphere breaking all false, manmade barriers. Freedom.
I’ve been a rather busy bee as of late. A well deserved three-year break from the norm has given me time to dream just a bit more. Now I’m breaking the boundaries and masks I built for decades hiding my true nature. High lithium daily dosages kept me docile and quiet for thirteen years. Now a fully awakened soul from the trivial anxieties of this shadow world. I’m so thankful now, beyond immense appreciation for the day my psychiatrist said, “you’re toxic.” He removed the lithium immediately. Within thirty-six hours I was alive and limitless.
When that thirty-sixth hour chimed on Tuesday night, I wrote a short story dialogue about our shared divine spark and the interconnectedness with everything in the universe. The following three years led to even more telling experiences. This time my own activated intuition, imagination, and intellect sent me on a journey. Now opportunities abound. I have been manifesting my dreams into living, breathing realities. What started out as daily journaling grew to thousands of notes, a book, a film, and a three-act play now in the works.
“If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.” — Nikola Tesla
“Leonardo da Vinci, Italian polymath of the High Renaissance, painter, sculptor, draftsman, theorist, architect, and engineer observed, ‘Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. So we must stretch ourselves to the very limits of human possibility. Anything less is a sin against both God and man.’”
My Path to Manic Depression Remission
I originally posted this in Bipolar Hope, but decided to also share it here and on my blog. My aunt shared with me that she wishes my uncle had the type of wisdom available that I was so fortunate to tap into during my mental health journey. Both inner knowledge, external experts, and divine truth.
Today I celebrate my mental health remission. How beating manic depression, aka bipolar 1, is not only possible, but it’s really not that complicated if we live mindfully and intentionally consistent. Consistency is the most important component of this golden elixir’s equation. My life has transformed from crippling anxiety to effortless.
How I achieve mental health remission. Written poorly by someone who rarely uses spellcheck. I’m a terrible writer, but hey I’m only human, right? Somedays I’m not so sure, but we’ll get to that another time. For now, let’s get to it. Call it combat training.
I wrote this earlier today in the BP Hope for Bipolar group. It’s not only my daily routine, but my recipe for achieving life balance. This includes my mental health of which I now refer to as my manic depression (bipolar 1) remission. If something resonates with you that’s great, if not that’s ok, too. 😉
This is my all day version. It’s all connected to being able to wind down at the end of the day.
I believe in the Roman philosopher Seneca who said “luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.” Luck doesn’t happen to us. We are an active participant in creating it. Our will manifests it.
Wake up thankful to have another day to live. Get up. Drink water. Open up the doors and appreciate the birds chirping. Make my bed with my headphones on. Eat savory food before anything sweet. Make coffee iced, sometimes mocha.
Exercise early each morning around 8:30. Get outside with music for 1.5 hours. Immerse in nature. Talk to the creatures I see that also notice me.
Smile at everything along my path. Even a half smile can boost our mood. I keep my headphones on a setting that allows me to still hear and connect with my natural surroundings. Nature interrupts my travels with dragonflies, hawks, and sometimes even a white feather hovering in mid-air. That last one I’ll tell you more about later.
While walking I keep Siri busy taking notes about thoughts and observations along my morning journey. In three years I’ve logged over 2,300 thoughts. I find practicing thinking on my feet is the most natural way for my mind to open. Wide.
Then later I review these notes, prioritize a few for the day and further explore them later that afternoon. Sometimes I forget them altogether. If it’s a good, solid idea I find they make their way back into my next walk or two. If it’s worth remembering, I will.
Sing, write, design, build, and learn something new each day. Talk to someone voice to voice and face to face. Body language is important and crucial for truly connecting with ourselves and others. Seeing is believing. We were never meant to rapid fire text each other in order to communicate. Stop doom scrolling. Start by sharing your voice.
Practice forgiveness and active listening. Stop focusing on finding the opportune moment to interrupt. Listen more and talk less. It’s not easy, I’ll be the first to admit.
Intermittent light fasting. Don’t overeat. Eat smaller meals. Drink smoothies with fruit and spinach. Eat fresh foods. Rest. Afternoon siesta. I learned how important this was while living in Cortona, Italy. Rest the body and mind. Refresh the soul.
No caffeine or sugar after 6 pm. Eat a well rounded meal supporting brain, heart, and gut health. Watch something funny or light hearted. Count my blessings. Pray for those I know, and especially those I’ll never know.
Give a wink to God, Mother Nature, and the Universe. Live simply shedding materialism. Be the light, energy, and awareness I seek. Give myself and even my demons a hug. Rest consistently. Yes, rest.
Make mistakes and try everything. That’s been my path to wisdom. Be willing to know and celebrate I know nothing. Socrates was right about that all along.
Breathe. Enjoy the silence. Be mindful. Celebrate solitude. In those moments our connection to everything is unbreakable. It’s within that divine interconnectedness we know we are never alone.
These practices have allowed me to not only manage, but overcome my manic depression, aka bipolar 1 disorder. I now say I’m in mental health remission. Yes, I still talk to my friend, the feisty owl, for a full five minutes.
P. S. Manic depression, aka bipolar 1, wasn’t something I acquired like the flu. It’s riddled throughout my entire family tree’s DNA. That’s not always a bad thing, either, because yes it crushes our souls, but it’s also the key in unlocking our superpowers.
If you’re curious, like me, do a search for artists and singers, actors and writers, poets and playwrights. They all had the divine spark of madness, too. Madness and genius go hand-in-hand. Ask around.
Two books I highly recommend if you’d like to understand manic depression further, take a look at Kay Redfield Jamison’s An Unquiet Mind and Touched with Fire. When I was first diagnosed with bipolar 1, I found these books quite helpful in guiding me through my new reality. I just noticed something funny. It’s no coincidence these two columns have eleven paragraphs each. Not by my own design. Just another natural synchronicity. :)